Tonight, was my first experience with Hot Candlelight Flow Yoga. This class was packed. You knew that everyone's personal space was going to be violated and sweat was going to be shared. It was just messy. In the middle of this hot and sweaty, self-inflicted battle between my body and I, the instructor mentioned that it was our ego that prevented us from focusing on our breath and just living in the moment. I have been thinking about this all night.
My husband tells me that my mind never stops planning and re-planning. He worries about my sleep patterns. it is midnight and I just took a break to write this piece. I admittedly, have a problem with taking on too many responsibilities at a time - many of them self-created. So, this comment about ego being the problem hit me, because, I have a problem. Since my father was murdered, I have had a faith problem. Not a belief in God issue, but more of a trust issue. I stay worried, because I am aware, more than I ever was, that life is fleeting. I thought I knew how much, but then this family-on-family assassination happened and poof, all of my knowing was dust.
I treasure being still, but I always recognize how much there is to do that I am not doing. I chose hot yoga, not for the stillness and meditation, but for the sweat. I began this experience with Barre Bootcamp. That is almost cardio! It was not until I began taking the regular hot yoga classes that I was forced to really focus on my breath. Breathing deeply is not my issue, but making my breath the main thing, the only thing that matters in the 90 degree room, has proven to be a daunting task. It is like the Last Samurai, where the Samurai tells, Tom Cruise that he cannot successfully battle because he has "too many mind." Tommy and I have the same problem. I am going to let these lessons sink in.
In the mug: Blue Cloud from Short and Stout Tea
Here, I share new discoveries and thoughts about things I love. Ride along with me. Comments are welcomed and appreciated.
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